Posted by: A. C. Cockerill | May 19, 2020

Picoblog Question – 2020 – Post #17

Picoblog Question – 2020 – Post #17

Here are nine lovely words–love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Continuing today with self-control, how can each of us have more self-control in our lives on a daily basis?

My two cents, but please share yours:

Everyone knows about exercising self-control when it comes to sticking with diets, to-do lists, and refraining from vices.

But here are a few more that are also important.

  • Maintaining optimism – consciously choosing to expect the best in that critical moment between a trigger and one’s response to it
  • Ditching shame – never give it, and never receive it
  • Allowing oneself time for rest
  • Allowing oneself to be a chatterbox the next time one goes out for lunch with a friend or colleague.

So, how can you have more self-control on a daily basis?


  1. Interesting. I expected your “chatterbox” point to go the other way: Let your friend or colleague be the chatterbox.

    Shame is a payment for bad behaviour. It’s called Conscience, a useful and important thing. But maybe that’s not what you are trying to say.

    • Hi Aunt Mary, You’re right. I am coming at these points from slightly different angles. For the chatterbox point, we are trained to always allow other people to go first out of courtesy. However, in stressful times, it may be helpful to apply the airplane guidelines of assisting ourselves first in order to better serve others–in this case to be better listeners. For the other point, I tend to draw a distinction between conviction and condemnation. I associate conscience with conviction and shame with condemnation. Conviction, hopefully, leads to better behavior. But condemnation leads to shame and, ultimately, guilt, often making situations worse. The recent practice of “shaming” people through false judgement has hurt, perhaps damaged, a lot of folks. Thank you so much for your comments and allowing me to clarify. 🙂 Cheers, Ashley

      • Ahh. I was thinking personal shame, rather than others (often strangers) shaming someone. This new shaming thing is way out of hand.

        I’m happy not to be part of Social Media. Trolls and Flames are not on my agenda! 😀

      • You are very wise, Aunt Mary! 🙂 Cheers, Ashley

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